food for thought

REGRETS AND RESENTMENTS OF THE PAST

     "My father always praised my brother and criticized me for my shortcomings." "My mom always showed more affection to my brother but reprimanded me on a daily basis." Be that men or women, many of us are bothered by such resentments even after many years of growing up. Tapes of such factual or imaginary parental mistreatments play in our mind repeatedly as if they are on 'auto rewind and play'. Slowly many of us begin to incorporate these thoughts in our self-image, such as, "I am a failure in life', 'Nobody likes me'.
     Like a monkey jumping from one tree to another, Mind often ruminates over one regret after another. We have very limited control on most aspects of life. One important thing we have a relatively good control on is 'self-talk', the talk we engage in silently with ourselves. We may not be able to erase old mental tapes which make us feel inferior but we can deliberately record and play new tapes of healthy self-talk. This tends to change our emotional climate. Positive self-talk can reduce anxiety, anger and hopelessness.
     Here are some examples of healthy self-utterances: "I am okay. It does not matter what others think about me.", "Whatever occurred in the past is bygone. Today is a new day of life. Let me make the best of it." “So what if I failed in this matter. All is not lost. There are many more ventures I can pursue in life." "I have a right to enjoy my life as long as I am not hurting anyone." "I have Goodwill to all and malice to none."….. Reiterating such statements in our mind can create new cheer in life.